160997

Joke of the Day

"A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks her if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no and gets off the bus."

"Let's get married and have kids so instead of doing fun stuff on the weekend we can go to a kid's birthday party where everyone coughs."

"I've been eating nothing but chicken for the past few days and I finally went to the bathroom. The stench was fowl."

"new iPhone 7 son: Daddy, buy me the new iPhone 7 Dad: What is the magic word? son: Natasha Dad: who is Natasha son: your lover Dad: do you need also a case?"

"In olden times, sacrifices were made at the altar. A practice that still continues"

"I couldn't work for that man anymore, especially now after what he said to me. He said, ""You're fired"""

"Q: Where do you find 60 million french jokes? A: In France."

"Queer Irishman Sean: Did ya here the one about the queer Irishman? Brian: No. Sean: Seems he was spotted leaving the pub at 11 o'clock with a girl. Brian: So? Sean: Closing time's one."

"Q: How does the blond turn on the light after she has had sex? A: She opens the car door."

"Two rednecks are sitting on a porch... ...watching a dog licking itself. One redneck says to the other, ""Boy, don't you wish you could do that?"" The other replies, ""That dog'd bite yooouuu!"""