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Joke of the Day

"Is there an apology card for: Sorry I kidnapped your dog and made him run on a treadmill to power my toaster last week, or no?"

"I often chastise my conservative grandpa for stereotyping black people.. I mean how rude it is to pick on jobless people raised by single mothers..."

"What can bring out your inner child? A coathanger."

"Dwarfs and midgets have very little in common."

"Where do Peek-a-boo patients go? The ICU."

"The people working at Petco.... ...hate when you refer to them as pet-ophiles."

"Girl: What do you like to do in your free time? Guy: I spy on people. Girl: Really? I like to take long walks in the park and go to the movies with my friends. Guy: I know."

"Do you know whats funnier than 24? 25."

"(No spoilers) What did Daredevil say after begrudgingly agreeing with The Punisher's brutally honest opinion that he's just a half-measure? ""You're such a Frank Castle."""

"What did the inn keeper say to the Big Dipper when he asked if he could rent a room? sorry this is only a four star hotel."