160020

Joke of the Day

"Army guy: sniper in the clock tower, 6 o'clock Me [seeing the time on the clock tower says 5 o'clock]: we'll worry about him in an hour then"

"What do you call a puppy combined with bread? Well, It's not a purebread anymore."

"Lorde wrote her Grammy nominated album at age 14. My son is 13 and has let the bathtub overflow twice while he was sitting INSIDE of it."

"I'm not calling you a slut, But if you had a password for your vagina it would be ""1234"""

"What do you call a hooker with a runny nose? Full I heard this on a radio show and thought it was worth sharing"

"Does anyone know any herbal remedies for worthlessness?"

"What did Ryan Lochte name his Gold medal? GoldiLochtes"

"To do list:nn1) Kill the fly in my room. nn2) Try to snort multivitamins.nn3) Practice Hadouken in mirror.nn4) Kill the fly's loved ones."

"What does a Redditor do at prom? He looks for the punchline"

"Why don't you see hippos hiding in trees? Because they are really f**king good at it."