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Joke of the Day
"Houses in detroit are a lot like cheap ugly hookers... Only $1, but still no one wants them."
Next Joke
"What do you call a fat alcoholic? A heavy drinker."
"A pregnant pause is like a regular pause but it doesn't have a period."
"""Fuller House"" was billed on a misleading premise. There wasn't a single geodesic dome to be seen."
"Eventually we'll all just have one app on our phones that electrocutes you when you stop looking at it."
"Her: when you said ""magical in bed"" this isn't exactly what I was exp- Me: *holds up 8 of hearts* is this your card Her: *softly* holy shit"
"Why is it difficult to pan for gold in Somalia? Because pyrites arrrrrr everywhere"
"Let me tell you a joke... Feminism."
"I'd tell a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction..."
"7yr old ""Do women get their periods on weekends too?"" Me ""Yes"" 7yr old mutters to herself ""Jesus Christ"""