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Joke of the Day

"I signed up today for a college American Fiction Literature class, apparently it was a really popular class. It was LIT AF"

"""I live my life .402 kilometers at a time, chap"" - Fast and Furious 7: Now We're British"

"What do you call a female physicist? A physicist you sexist."

"How to Fall Down the Stairs Step 1 Step 3 Step 7, 9, 11, 13"

"What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Mice cream and cake!"

"I hate it when a guy pulls out a chair in front of me. I'm never sure if he's a gentleman or a chair thief."

"2% of Japanese have cataracts... The rest drive Toyota and Nissan."

"I sleep with my glasses on so I can dream up smart shit."

"What's the funniest part of a boxing joke? You'd think it'd be the punchline, but apparently it's funnier when the person feints..."

"Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have? Palm Sunday."