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Joke of the Day

"Two atoms in a pub Two atoms meet in the pub. One says, 'I think I've lost an electron.' The second atom with a strong British accent asks, 'Are you sure?' The first one replies, ' yes I'm positive.'"

"Unless you've studied Nazism at a Nazi university and you've read Mein Kampf (in German), your criticism of Nazism isn't valid -Nobody ever"

"What screams, wails, and lights up? A bus-load of babies on fire."

"What do you get when you divide the circumference of a Jack o' Lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi"

"A mexican and black person have a car race. They both end up going over a cliff and die. Who won the race? Society."

"Yes, people who exercise live longer. But those extra years are spent...umm...excercising!"

"Unemployment gives you time to follow your true passion: Worrying about money."

"The man entered his home and was absolutely delighted when he discovered someone has stolen every lamp in his house."

"I dropped my popcicle in the tub. I'm awfully sad. It was banana. Now it just tastes like bubble bath."

"Shazam but for telling you the name of someone who's only just been introduced to you 5 minutes ago but you weren't listening."