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Joke of the Day

"I remember the last thing my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket He said ""How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"""

"I saw a black guy running down the street carrying a tv I thought for a second, ""man that looks a lot like mine' so I ran home quick and nope there was mine still shining my shoes."

"Which type of bees make milk? Boo-bees"

"Why was the bee sent out of class? Because he was beehiving badly."

"The lady in front of me wearing yoga pants keeps bending over to pick up quarters, hope she will for dimes too, as I'm out of quarters."

"Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted."

"What's the best thing about Switzerland? I'm not sure, but their flag is a big plus."

"Do I just call you or should we resolve this quickly with 200 text messages?"

"Q: How does a blonde turn the lights on in the morning? A: She opens the car door."

"They say, ""the grass is greener on the other side..."" That's why Pablo, my landscaper, imports my marijuana."