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Joke of the Day

"Waitress: need anything else? Me: yes, a cup of black coffee. W: and how would u like your coffee? M: uhhh..black and in a cup?"

"I saw a woman crying on a park bench so I sat down and hugged her and whispered ""please stop stealing my spotlight"""

"Knock Knock ""Who's there?"" ""Dunno, but i do know its not Michael Brown"""

"So I bought a fragrant candle the other day, but when I lit it nothing happened... It just didn't make scents."

"Every time you reach under the couch for something a giant spider must choose whether or not to give up its secure location."

"What's a Redditor's favorite food? Copy pasta! ^^I'm ^^so ^^sorry"

"I'm trying this new thing where I don't beat off it's hard"

"I like my women like I like my joke formats: worn out from overuse."

"Why did the guy cut a hole in his carpet? ...He wanted to watch the floor show. And why did he cover it back up? ...He realized that he didn't want to watch the ""hole"" show."

"you really have to admire brits who voted to leave They were so worried about immigrants ruining their economy than they preempted it by doing it themselves."