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Joke of the Day

"I made a model aircraft. I wanted it to be an unpainted smooth finish wooden aircraft. So I made a plain planed plane plane."

"I need to buy a 4k TV, no matter what. It's my new year resolution."

"[Original] What do you call it when two Cox company vehicles pull into your driveway? Double penetration."

"To make a mistake is human. To admit a mistake is stupid."

"My wife said sex with me is like a supersoaker water gun! Just two pumps and a squirt!"

"did you hear about the new fruit powered motor? it runs on apples but it still mangoes"

"Last night, I poked a woman in the eye with my penis She's gone a bit cockeyed since."

"What do you call a Jewish Pokemon master? Ash"

"'Dances with Wolves'... But it's just me, running around my backyard with an uncooked steak, screaming, while the neighborhood dogs bark."

"*wife and I start having an argument in a crowded restaurant* *she storms out upset* *I follow* Outside: ""DINE AND DASH SUCCESS!"" *high 5*"