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Joke of the Day

"Seriously how much of Krypton fell to earth and how do bad guys keep finding it? You're Superman, handle your shit. This ain't a game, dawg."

"What is the fastest mineral in the world? The malacheetah."

"Ancient people: turned grapes into wine, agave into tequila, and sugar cane into rum. Modern people: turn soy, rice, or almonds into milk."

"Microsoft skipped Windows 9 because 7, 8, 9"

"What do engineers use for birth control? Their personality."

"Adam says to Eve... ""I wear the plants in this relationship!"""

"What is a Pokemon's favourite place to go in France? Paras"

"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problem out with a pencil."

"How do you teach a Jew to pay attention? You send him to a concentration camp."

"Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left him."