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Joke of the Day

"This is Major Tom to Ground Control. This protocol is bad. Why is it we are singing to each other? It's no wonder our funding has gone away."

"A Ginger's skin goes... ""YOU... SHALL NOT... TAAAANNN!!"""

"An Irishman walks into a bar.... And then another Irishman walks into the bar. And another one. And another one. And another one. And another one. And another one."

"This hotel has the worst mini-bar. All the little bottles of booze taste like shampoo."

"Che: ""Why do you want to participate in this guerrilla war?"" Me: [picturing myself leading an army of gorillas into battle] ""Independence."""

"Why do Indians get cremated at very religious places? Because they all have a ""Vera Nice Sea"". (Say it out loud)"

"I overheard an extremely perverted frog at the pond yesterday. Kept saying ""rubbit"""

"A guy walks into a bar.... ...holding a set of jumper cables and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says ""okay, I'll serve you, but don't you start anything!"""

"How do you detach frogs leg You Ribbit"

"Wife:Did you take ambien last night? Me: *recalls riding a unicorn that's on fire* No, why? W:The dog's wearing a saddle and she's orange."