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Joke of the Day

"I think it's about time we stopped accepting Quasimodo and demanded 100% modo."

"snow ice or cold puns I wanted to see everybody's best ice snow or cold puns,"

"Only in Scotland, will you ever see a man take a piss on a door, then open it and walk inside. (credit: Frankie Boyle)"

"Why does NASA drink sprite? Because they couldn't get 7up"

"Sorry, but your password must contain an uppercase letter, a number, a haiku, a gang sign, a hieroglyph, a feather off a hawk and the blood of a unicorn."

"My mate is setting up a helpline for men who are addicted to masturbating..... I hope he pulls it off....."

"I've been playing this online game where you mostly end up immobilised and eaten alive by insects. It's alright, but just feels like another form of e-scaphism."

"Have you heard about the new German Microwave? I heard it can seat 10"

"If you woke up and couldn't remember the night before and your ass hurt real bad would you tell anyone? Want to go camping?"

"Feminists hate words with masculine-sounding roots... ...maybe that's why none of them have any manners."