153328

Joke of the Day

"People are mad because MTV doesn't show music videos. What about Fox News? They haven't shown a fox in months. (Craig Ferguson)"

"ANYTHING can be considered your job if you hate it enough."

"The correct response to ""How was your weekend?"" is ""Fine."" If you ever stray from that dialogue, please know that nobody gives a shit."

"Load your plate up high, then take it to the kitchen, toss it all in the blender, and take your ""shake"" back to the table. Announce that it's the new Thanksgiving Weight Loss Shake"

"(DARK HUMOR) Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands."

"Hide a Body? What's the best place to hide a body? Page two of Google."

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? (Gagging on big cock noise)"

"Some people call it anal bleaching, but I prefer to call it changing my ring tone."

"What food are you able to can? Cannibal (can able) food."

"Bumped into a friend of mine the other day. He was wearing camouflage."