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Joke of the Day

"I'm kind of clueless about pop culture. I thought ""Hogwarts"" was an STD"

"Did you hear about the guy whose penis looks like Professor X? The resemblance is uncanny."

"Why did Jesus die on the cross? He forgot the safe word."

"Did you hear the joke about butter? No? I guess it didn't spread then"

"Why are artificial eyes made from glass? They gotta be see-through"

"I respect strippers because its really hard to dance by yourself and not look stupid."

"how do I keep my skin looking so young? it's all thanks to [turns to camera smiling] an ancient curse [locusts pour from my mouth & eyes]"

"When someone describes themselves as a ""foodie"" I automatically assume they shit a lot."

"What are Mario's overalls made of Denim, Denim, Denim"

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the P is silent."