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Joke of the Day
"Eli5: how preventing users from submitting anything to subs helps anything."
Next Joke
"How do you confuse a Daily Mail reader? Tell him that asylum seekers kill pedophiles."
"Me: *eating 3rd Twix of the day* Her: You eat too much candy, you're going to make me a widow Me: *orders 10 truckloads & cancels all plans*"
"What do you call an excited rectangle? An erectangle."
"What has only one arm and can't swim? An excavator."
"They say that all things come in threes and yeah maybe I did too once because I was really drunk and she looked like a five."
"I always carry a jellyfish in case I need to pee on someone."
"Condom Q. What did the penis say to the condom? A. ""Cover me. I'm going in."""
"Having a Hot Wife is like being a diabetic with a coupon for unlimited cheesecakes. It may look nice but you never get to use it. Source: Have a Hot Wife, Never get laid"
"Got in a fight with my wife while camping... It was in tents."