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Joke of the Day

"I have some things I need to get off my chest. I've been letting things pile up on it, and I'm pretty sure I left my checkbook in that chest. Hay-ooooooooooo!!!"

"To all the single people this Valentines weekend Go fuck yourself ;-)"

"migraine |my-grain| noun 1 a recurrent severe headache 2 what a farmer shouts in disbelief after a terrible storm destroys his wheat field"

"I got a tattoo of a gong Because I heard it's cool to get a tattoo of a Chinese cymbal"

"How many countries border Germany? Nein!"

"Of course Goldman Sachs called their clients ""muppets"" Some of them ended up living in garbage cans."

"I'm a virgin but I have sex sometimes"

"Catching imaginary characters ""How much time do you waste catching imaginary characters on your phone"" my father said to me as I was playing Pokemon Go. And then he left for the temple."

"A student sits at his desk and begins his economics exam. He opens the paper and reads the first question. To Germany, how much is Greece worth - 1 mark"

"Ever wonder why Dallas Cowboy fans are so rich? Because they never have to pay for super bowl tickets!"