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Joke of the Day

"Boss: Got good news & bad news. Me: Ya? Him: I'm leaving for another job. Me: Ok..Whats the bad news? Him: .. Me: You planning to come back?"

"911: What's your emergency? Me: Are you guys hiring? 911: This is an emergency line. Me: No shit. Why do you think I'm calling?"

"What did one wall say to the other wall? Meet you at the corner."

"If at first you don't succeed.. Then that's it for skydiving."

"A spokesman for Kelloggs says the company now fears the recent incident may be the work of a cereal offender."

"Before handing your wallet and wife's necklace over to that angry gunman, pause to consider how sweet it would be if your son became Batman."

"Did you hear about the water that got so angry that he boiled himself? He just had to let off some steam."

"How many eggs does a Frenchman need? One, because that's an Oeuf."

"What do you do if a bird shits on your head? Don't go out with her again!"

"#WhyDoPeopleThinkItsOkayTo replace letters in words with numbers....well now i don't feel like reading the math equation you just sent me"