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Joke of the Day

"Boss: Got good news & bad news. Me: Ya? Him: I'm leaving for another job. Me: Ok..Whats the bad news? Him: .. Me: You planning to come back?"

"Your life doesn't get better by chance. It gets better by choice."

"AWE YEAH,,, I just washed my dog with Axe body wash... He's gonna to get ALL DA B!TCHES"

"I was the photographer at a vegan wedding this weekend They kept getting mad when I told them to say cheese."

"If sleep is the cousin of death, then nap-kins are at least relatives."

"Where do you see yourself in 10 years? In a mirror."

"What kind of grass do cows like most? It's a moot point!"

"What's M. Night Shyamalan's favorite flavor of ice cream? Twist"

"Prince has died. The artist fully known as alive."

"Sometimes you need to look for the small positives in life. Like a midget with HIV."