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Joke of the Day

"Why was the blind guy always so happy? He couldn't see any reason not to be!"

"From all the butts, ours is the most important."

"I wrote a poem about communism for my English class I had to share it with everyone"

"What do you call a lesbian with big hands? Well hung!"

"Better than a Justin Bieber concert: 1. Being deaf. 2. A rattlesnake bite. 3. Chewing razor blades. 4. Licking a public toilet seat."

"I was having dinner .. .. .. with Garry Kasporov and on the table was a checkered tablecloth. It took him 2 hours to pass me the salt."

"How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it."

"I am part of the 1% Well, at least my cell phone battery is."

"Did you hear about that Hollywood actress who got stabbed? Um what's her name? Blonde girl, Reece someone .... ""Witherspoon?"" No, no. It was with a knife."

"Friend - You smell nice, what's that perfume you're wearing? Me - Fear and fabric softener."