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Joke of the Day
"I tried to grab some fog. I mist."
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"Short joke What do you call a short person that knows Martial Arts? Midjitsu!"
"Burnt my Hawaiian pizza last night. Should have put it on aloha setting."
"Protip: If a party guest says ""I don't dance"" what he's really telling you is ""make my drinks stronger please""."
"Why did Serj Tankian cross the road? because he wanted to..."
"Hi my name is, Rick Harrison and this is my pawn shop."
"""I am the ghost of Christmas Future Perfect Subjunctive: I will show you what would have happened were you not to have changed your ways!"""
"It's fun to watch babies taste new things like ice cream, lemons, or 9-volt batteries."
"BARNES: ""What if it wasn't just empty cabinets?"" NOBLE: ""Let's sell books!"" AND: ""This is why we make such a great team."""
"If my friends and I torrent in Jamaica Does that make us Pirates of the Caribbean?"