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Joke of the Day

"What is the driest soda you can buy? Baking soda."

Next Joke
 
"Took the sticker off a banana, put it on my shirt and said, ""I hereby deputize you to uphold the law in Bananatown!"" Elevator is silent now."
"How do you know when a woman is pregnant? She switches from Ragu to Prego."
"Doctors say eating a piece of Bacon takes 9 mins off your life...if my math is correct i died in 1781"
"Today must be my lucky day... I found 95 in the urinal."
"Sometimes I just get the urge to belt out The Lion Sleeps Tonight. After all, it's only a whim away."
"My girlfriend got so mad she battered me with some vegetables. She has a terrible tempura."
"The next time you make fun of a ginger, put yourself in their shoes. You'll know how bad it hurts to not have a sole."
"Her: Ok, on 3 lets,say what movie our marriage is most like. 1.. 2.. 3 *simultaneously* Her: THE NOTEBOOK Me: SHAWSHANK REDEMPTIONOTEBOOK"
"Why don't chicken coops have Four doors? because then they would be Chicken sedans"