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Joke of the Day

"The bright side of global warming is that 100% of our great grandchildren will own beachfront property."

"Whats worse than having to break up with your Japanese girlfriend for the first time? Her not hearing you, so you drop the bomb a 2nd time."

"How to be funny [OC] How to be funny: 1) Why 2) Was 3) Six 4) Afraid 5) Of 6) Seven 7) 8) 9)"

"If a girl is preventing you from reaching your goal then she's a keeper"

"What's brown and sticky. A stick."

"New Year's Eve probably sucks for Lance Armstrong... He can't enjoy watching the ball drop."

"If something happened to me today, my legacy would be how much my kids say ""like"""

"I was always really bad with numbers But I think my 34 inch dick makes up for it."

"On the bright side, this is gonna be the most environmentally friendly olympics... On the bright side, this is gonna be the most environmentally friendly olympics, even the pools are going green."

"When people tell me I look like my mother, I assume they mean disappointed."