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Joke of the Day

"It's like trying run the BostonMarathon with Siamese Twins... They're both pulling in different directions"

"People in sleeping bags are the soft tacos of the bear world."

"TIL about different subreddits. SHIT..."

"Why was Osama Bin Laden obsessed with Eminem? He was an Afghani-Stan."

"I don't understand why the Lions and Vikings get to play on thanksgiving. Shouldn't the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium?"

"Accountants are very clever opponents. They are used to being underestimated."

"Why did the hipster go to the gynecologist? To get a Pabst smear."

"What do you call the kids claiming ""We don't need no education""? Comfortably Dumb"

"Two fish are swimming upstream and one of the fish hits his head against concrete. He looks to the other, and says ""dam"""

"I just stopped by the Apple store to use the restroom. iPeed."