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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a carpet cleaning company based out of Ohio? Cleveland Steamers"

"A new study finds marijuana users are not more likely to have car accidents. Mostly because they're usually too high to find their cars."

"I used a fax machine today!! I also ran all the cotton thru the gin and plowed the field with my oxen while it finished dialing up."

"Loneliness is when you get an e-mail but it's from the newsgroup server."

"Can't believe it's already been 10 years since you had to pay for music."

"What did the number 0 say to the number 8? Nice belt."

"What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can actually finish off a race"

"A husband came home with half gallon a of ice cream and asked his wife if she wanted some. ""How hard is it?"" she asked. ""About as hard as my dick,"" he replied. ""Pour me some."""

"""Speak softly and carry a big stick."" -- Teddy Roosevelt ""Yell loudly and talk about the size of your stick."" -- Donald Trump"

"Why did the kiddie pool have no friends? Because it was too shallow."