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Joke of the Day

"[HR office] Do you know why we called you in today? To give me a pay rise? No. Because I googled 'How to burn down office' 600 times? Yes."

"What's the difference between magic and black magic? Black magic doesn't work."

"Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the last one that had a dream got assassinated"

"I arranged a Reddit meet up for /r/sexaddicts... ...and everyone came!"

"I'm not going to make my daughter choose a religion, I'll explain the differences & when the time comes she can choose either Marvel or DC."

"Do you want to have a home? You need a ho and you need me"

"*uses ipad as a phone* Hey look at me i'm a hobbit"

"My family is very poor. If I don't wakeup with a boner on Christmas morning I won't have anything to play with."

"Meatloaf just collapsed on stage Mom is losing her skills in the kitchen"

"Why can't you ever trust an atom? Because they make up everything"