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Joke of the Day
"When in doubt, just do the opposite of whatever the girl with glitter on her face does."
Next Joke
"Why do pirates have trouble walking? Arrrr-thritis"
"Q: Why did the mother cat put stamps on her kittens? - A: Because she wanted to mail a litter."
"I hate when people use words without knowing the meaning...gives me a huge hysterectomy on the side of my head."
"Did you hear about the terrorists who hijacked a plane of lawyers? They threatened to release one every hour til their demands were met."
"What do you call a horse that plays the violin? Fiddler on the hoof!"
"4-year-old from next door got a whistle for his birthday and I got 1 phone call."
"Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die."
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? ""Its a really obscure number. You've probably never heard of it."""
"Why don't they give hurricanes epic names like cyclone of doom or the fate fairy instead of frikken Sandy...."