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Joke of the Day

"I've replaced my neighbors toothpaste with Napalm, and left him a free pack a cigarettes. Now we wait."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light-bulb? THAT'S NOT FUNNY!"

"100,000 sperm and you were the fastest?"

"We should get the Amazon Echo on Reddit It would feel at home in this echo chamber"

"- I'm here to register for the pessimists' club. - Is the glass half empty or half full? - What glass? - Gentlemen, we have a new leader!"

"Hold.. Hold.. Hold.. CHARGE!!!!! -Ice at the bottom of a glass"

"Ugh! We get it, sun! You're really bright and shit, now calm down."

"Typical coworkers. They complain about management, but when it's time to dispose of the boss's body, they all pretend to be working."

"What do you call Muhammad Ali after he eats lots of beans? Gaseous Clay"

"What's grey? A melted penguin!"