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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a yoghurt and America? If you leave a yoghurt for 200 years, it will eventually develop a culture. Plus the yoghurt's fat free."

"One thing I've learned about this world is that there are always going to be people who want to change you. -babies"

"Me: *gets on scale* 5yo: Whoa! That's a lot of points!"

"Why do they call camels 'ships of the desert'? Because they are full of Arab semen."

"My grandpa told me this before he kicked the bucket. He said, ""Son, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"""

"As a white person, I have a primal fear of getting lost in the snow."

"Why can't Caitlyn Jenner lie to her kids? She's a transparent."

"What's the difference between a trump supporter and a newly adopted Siberian husky? The dog has the mental fortitude to realize he's just gotten owned by a Russian."

"I'm not lazy, I'm on energy saving mode."

"I like my women like I like my coffee All ground up and in the freezer."