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Joke of the Day

"I got my first kiss from a girl today.... It was milk chocolate."

"I had a dog that always used to chase people on motorcycles In the end I had to take the keys off him"

"My girlfriend says I can't visualise things I can't imagine why."

"Dogs have masters. Cats have staff."

"Judge me all you want, but I love jokes about dead children. They never get old."

"""Cool hand, Luke."" - Darth Vader, enviously"

"what do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs? *""I don't know. What?""* a condescending con descending."

"This ATM will not give me free money no matter how many times I try the Konami Code."

"Apparently, ""Dude, that's the best she's EVER going to look"" was not the type of objection to the marriage the priest was asking about."

"The easiest way to get rid of a ghost is to ask him for some rent money or to help with the dishes"