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Joke of the Day

"Valentine's Day is for people who lack the imagination to be romantic during the rest of the year."

"I told my Canadian friend that I ran zero miles today... she said that was 0K"

"What do you call a puppy combined with bread? Well, It's not a purebread anymore."

"Blind dates are the best because they can't see me stealing all of the food from their plate"

"some people are like slinkys They really aren't good for anything but it feels great when you push them down the stairs."

"Hard tacos are just soft tacos from the street."

"Sometimes ""4 star hotel"" means 4 porn stars have stayed there. In the same room. At the same time. With a camera crew. And a goat."

"Refusing to go to the gym counts as resistance training, right?"

"A pregnant pause is like a regular pause but it doesn't have a period."

"What was Rudolph's nickname? Names. Because they used to laugh and call him Names. Credit to my dad."