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Joke of the Day

"So I was in the library the other day... My black friend comes over and ask me where the color printers were at. I looked up and said ""it's 2015 man you can use whatever printer you want""."

"What do you call a tank rolling through the streets of poland? Ghetto Blaster"

"Q: What do Roseanne Barr and a battleship have in common? A: They both need three tugs to get into their slips."

"Did you hear Ellen DeGeneres drowned? They found her face down in Rikki Lake"

"What stretches further, skin or rubber? Skin, it says in the scripture that Moses tied his ass to a tree and walked 3 miles to the next town."

"What happens when you see two twin sister witches? You don't know which witch is which!"

"A man finds 3 magic lamps in the Sahara.... ...he says ""Damn, I wish there was an outlet.""."

"What has eight arms and an IQ of 60? Four guys watching a football game."

"I saw a guy at an ATM with no arms, and a peg leg He asked if I would help him check his balance... so I pushed him over"

"My wife wants to go on a romantic date for Valentine's Day so I guess I'll stay home with the kids."