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Joke of the Day

"""What's the difference between a blow job and a sandwich?"" Me: ""What's the difference between a blow job and a sandwich?"" Her: ""I don't know"" Me: ""Want to come over to my house for lunch?"""

"What do you call a skinhead underwater? An oister"

"did you know that protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic!"

"Why do you never see any bugs in a church? Because they are in sects."

"What do you get when you cross Christmas and a Duck? A Christmas-Quacker!"

"What do you get when you cross a tiger and a chicken? Just the tiger"

"Confucius said, man who sleep with itchy bum... ... wake up with smelly finger. BA DUM TSS~"

"Why don't women like drinking beer at the beach? Because they'll get sand in their schlitz."

"You know that warm feeling you get when you look at your spouse? It's called acid reflux."

"Accidentally bought a Venti at Starbucks and now I can't afford to go to college :("