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Joke of the Day

"I refrain from jogging in the morning because according to Law & Order: SVU there is a 95% chance you'll find a dead body"

"We waste our entire youth to obtain wealth and later on our entire wealth to obtain youth."

"Why did the stonemason break up with the female con artist? She took him for granite."

"Too Soon? I heard the Black Friday deals were amazing."

"How does a ghost start a letter? Tomb it may concern."

"Why are Indian the best in bed? They always come late."

"I'd rather get killed by the Blair Witch on the first night than have to camp another night."

"Two guys in Ohio die and wake up in hell The paramedics revived them"

"What's the difference between an airport shop and a golf course covered in bacon? One's a duty free, the others a Jew free tee."

"I forgot to put on deodorant today but not to worry, if this urinal cake is good enough for the bathroom then it's good enough for me."