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Joke of the Day

"Remember: You can eat your way out of almost any problem."

"What's the best side of the house to build a deck on? The outside"

"When attempting to make a good first impression imagine how important good grammar is. Wrong. Importanter."

"An alpaca made me an offer I couldn't refuse. I guess it was an Alpac'ino."

"Did you hear about the butcher that backed into his meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work."

"I think the main issue with 'The Hunger Games' is that while her life is at stake, boy problems are still presented as legitimate threats."

"""Some say Jesus drove a Honda, but didn't like to talk about it"" ""For I did not speak of my own Accord..."" - John 12:49"

"I hate one-dimensional games. They're so linear."

"If you make fun of Rod Blagojavich's hair, there'll be hell toupee."

"I used to repost stolen comedian jokes and try to pass them off as my own. I still do but I used to too."