144846

Joke of the Day

"Cop: Know why I stopped u? Cuz u JUST CAN'T FIGHT THIS FEELING ANYMORE? Cop: I'VE FORGOTTEN WHAT WE STARTED FIGHTIN FOOOR For speeding."

"Why aren't there any headache tablets in the jungle? Because the parrots eat them all!"

"If I go to your place for the first time, unless you live in a castle, please don't ask me if I want a tour."

"What do a lonely astronaut and your thumbs have in common? They both hang out at the Space Bar."

"What did one orphan say to the other? ""Robin, get in the batmobile"""

"Did you hear about the new German microwave? It seats 20."

"Gonna start referring to my Facebook feed as Chick-Fil-A because it's just a bunch of propaganda from cows who can't spell."

"""What do we want?!!"" ""PSYCHIC POWERS! NOW!"" ""When do we want it?!!"""

"if you're in a bathroom & person in next stall sneezes, do you say bless you or just applaud like normal? need answer fast too late clapping"

"How many children did Josh Duggar molest? 19 kids and counting. Too soon? :/"