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Joke of the Day

"My mother always says make the little things in life count. Tomorrow I'm gonna run free math seminars for midgets"

"I can't believe you ""accidentally"" let it slip into her butt! Dick move, asshole."

"PBS is starting a new children's show... for kids along the Mexican-American border. It's called Maquiladora the Explorer."

"What do you get when you cross Godzilla, saved by the bell, and crystal meth? Go go power rangers!"

"It is so cold... fire hydrants are flagging down dogs to piss on them."

"The older I get, the more I understand why Squidward is always so annoyed."

"*robs neighbor's chicken coop* *serves poached eggs*"

"Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give their vacuum one more chance?"

"How can you tell if a picture was taken with a GoPro? because the owner will tell you"

"Why does a midget laugh while running Because the grass tickles his balls"