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Joke of the Day

"I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job at the construction site... But when I got home, all the signs were there."

"What do you get when you cross a Barbie Doll with the Pillsbury Doughboy Some rich know-it-all bitch with a yeast infection"

"Whats hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that it's often poked before.... A Key"

"My gynecologist didn't think my ventriloquism skills were as charming as I did."

"There's no point in using a big word, when an infinitesimally diminutive one will do."

"Today a guest asked if we sold leggings for dogs (I'm not even kidding, this was a real request) I guess he owns a basic bitch"

"Yo mamma's so fat... that she takes selfies in panorama mode"

"Fat chances are my favorite chances"

"Q: Why do bikes have kick-stands? A: Because they're two-tired."

"""Daddy, what does 'autonomous' mean?"" ""Do your own fucking homework!"""