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Joke of the Day
"What do you call bad Mediterranean food? Falawful."
Next Joke
"What is the car that everyone sleeps in? The Ford Siesta Many thanks to /u/ekhappychap for that one."
"I just made the greatest construction-related pun of all time Works on so many levels"
"Wow I never thought you'd agree to go out with me *starts car, Whitesnake is playing at full volume*"
"Friends are a lot like trees... They fall down when they are hit with an axe multiple times."
"What's the richest kind of air? A millionaire."
"Student: What is the chance we are alone in the universe? Professor: Astronomical."
"I will put you in your place. -me to everything because OCD"
"How do you spot a meth - head in Wal-Mart... In the light - bulb isle with their cart turned upside down, fixing a squeaky wheel."
"Women always call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor."