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Joke of the Day
"Today is the first day of the rest of your life and you've already screwed it up."
Next Joke
"I was about to tell a gay joke butt fuck it!"
"Sent a tweet with a typo. Deleted it and now I'm gonna be bummed about until mid June."
"Do the right thing today: Go to someone's profile, scroll down 4 months, and like something."
"A WWII Joke! What did the German Shepherd say at his Nuremberg trial? ""I was just following odors."""
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Adore ! Adore who ? Adore stands between us open up !"
"The best part about twitter is that it is completely satisfying on a deep emotional level and in no way makes me feel empty inside."
"Three elephants fell off a cliff. Two fell on land. One fell in the water.Boom-boom-chhh!"
"Argentina is surprisingly cold. In fact it's bordering on Chile."
"How many ADD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna ride bikes?"