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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a man of high authority, stoned out of his mind strolling along in the forest? Hiking"

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"What's the difference between people who voted for Trump, and those that didn't? On average, about $30,000 in student debt."
"What kind of photos do turtles take? Shellfies"
"A dwarf psychic escaped from a police holding cell. Headlines read ""Small Medium at Large"""
"Why are all Satanists trypophobic? They're grossed out by Holy things."
"What do you call a rape in the military? A flashbang."
"Why was Noah a great economist? He kept his stock afloat while everything else was in liquidation."
"How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus? Never enough."
"Me: You bought 6 bottles of carpet cleaning solution? Wife: Yes. Me: We have hard wood floors. Wife: I had a coupon that was expiring today!"
"What the 0 said to the 8 ? Nice belt, dude !"