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Joke of the Day
"[the last supper] Waiter: ok, your bill comes to 30 pieces of silver Judas: I got this"
Next Joke
"Why are so many people in San Francisco homeless? They can't afford an apartment because they only make 50 grand per year."
"I just walked by an old man who kept saying, ""One, three, five, seven, nine... one, three, five, seven, nine..."" I thought, ""How odd."""
"Fun prank idea: Take your friend's fiancee to lunch and say things that give her doubts about the relationship."
"Everyone should learn how to masturbate properly. It comes in handy"
"How many Dragon Ball Z episodes does it take to change a lightbulb? ***Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z***"
"What do you get when you cross an octopus with a black person? I don't know either, but it would be great at picking cotton."
"Does anybody know the name of that Godzilla Movie? It's the one where another monster actually breaks one of Godzilla's legs. I can't remember the name of the movie, but it has a huge cast."
"They call me the pussy destroyer. I run the best Asian restaurant around."
"Why can't you make fun of Steve Jobs' death? ... Because it's not PC"