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Joke of the Day

"Falling for someone from Twitter is as intelligent as trying to give yourself a lobotomy with a sharpened jelly donut."

"Q: When is a school paper not a school paper? A: When it's turned into the teacher."

"What do you call a camel with no humps? *Humphrey!*"

"My wife and I tried anal for the first time... is it supposed to hurt this much? i couldn't sit upright for a while..."

"How do you measure a Lego figure's shoe size? In square feet."

"Fun Fact: 100% of people don't know what to do with a dirty dish at someone else's house."

"What is worst then the holocaust? 6 million Jews"

"In Louisville, KY where bars are open till 4 am. Here's my slogan for them: ""Get upchucky in Kentucky."""

"Why is my algebra textbook so sad? It has a lot of problems."

"Wanna hear something fucked up? When you find your dads wedding ring in your sister..."