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Joke of the Day

"I ducked into a crowd of guys bro hugging as they left the bar, they didn't notice the stranger in their midst and I'm feeling so loved rn."

"In my spare time I like to read, write, and fall in love with unavailable people."

"Why was the little shoe unhappy? Because his father was a loafer and his mother was a sneaker."

"Not all wood floats Natalie wood, for example."

"What's the biggest advantage to living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus."

"Winter is great because it gets dark earlier and you can get a head start on your shady activities."

"I had a conversation with a Mobius strip... It was one-sided."

"i take valium & viagra so if i dont get a fuck i dont give a fuck"

"My car is 13 years old. I like how the ceiling fabric hangs down and makes it feel like a blanket fort."

"how would u like your steak sir? we've got rare, ultra rare, legendary, fossil, or u can try and catch your own steak in the safari zone"