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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between the Devil and Ted Cruz? The Devil has standards."
Next Joke
"Who does a lobster have in common with a broken hearted chinaman? They are both crustaceans."
"I have a stepladder I never knew my real ladder"
"Then: Me: I want McDonald's Mom: Do you have McDonald's money? Now: Mom: I want grandkids Me: Do you have grandkids money??"
"2016 being a beast of a year really adds up! 666 + 666 + 666 + 6 + 6 + 6 = 2016"
"[college ad] High schoolers: You've sat in a chair for 4 years. How would you like to do that again, but this time at enormous cost to you?"
"Appalachian Dictionary Virgin: (noun) - A 12 year old girl that can run faster than her brother."
"Went for ""a walk"" today, like some kind of prehistoric moron."
"I found my friend poking holes in my condoms... Dick move..."
"Us guys like to be held too. Just, you know, lower. Lowwwwwerrrrrrrr."