139798

Joke of the Day

"Why does Marx only drink herbal tea? Because property is theft."

"I feel really bad for people suffering from prolonged erections. They must have it so hard."

"What command does the aardvark give most often when he sails? Snout about!"

"INFORMER!!! Younosaydahdfrxqpgirnmekdmhgjwrztnhyenixblaamm... A LICKY BOOM BOOM DOWN!"

"Scientists created the first white laser. They were fired for racism and hate speech."

"How many potatoes does it take to kill an irish family? None"

"""It's just bananas, bananas, bananas with you,"" the wife shouted. ""If I told you I was going to leave you because of this ridiculous obsession, what would you say?"" ""Well, thanks a bunch,"" I replied."

"Eventually the entire written English language will be taken over by emoticons. Teenage girls will bring us back to Egyptian hieroglyphs."

"What do you call a gangster Hobbit? Yolo Swaggins"

"My genes put the XY in sexy"