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Joke of the Day
"I slept like a baby last night. I pooped my pants and cried myself to sleep."
Next Joke
"You have a dime in one hand and a nickel in the other. What are you? Broke."
"""I'm so wasted!!"" Vegetables in my refrigerator."
"My 4 year old refused his dinner but it's ok because I caught him eating a Milkbone earlier"
"Have you seen the new globe they're making? It's revolutionary"
"A heads up.. So when searching for a place to eat at work and a coworker tells you about The Black Angus Campfire Feast and the boss is standing behind you. Check the spelling before hitting enter."
"Yoga? No thank you. I'll download an app to my phone so I don't have to stretch for the remote."
"Three reddit mods walk into a bar [Removed]"
"Macbeth Joke Lady Macbeth: Out damned spot! The dog named Spot: Ruff ruff ruff. [Exeunt/Leaves] Spot (Aside): Wow, I wonder why she hates me so much? I thought my bark was polite enough!"
"If only Africa had more mosquito nets... then every year we could save millions of mosquitos dying needlessly of aids."