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Joke of the Day

"DRAKE: I'll drop the best album of 2016. BEYONCE: Nah. DRAKE: The best album of... April? BEYONCE: Nah. DRAKE: Please don't do this to me."

"What do you call a dangerous fish who drinks too much ? A beer-a-cuda !"

"Divorce is like hitting the reset button on Super Mario Bros except now you pay for the Princess's castle and hope Bowser kills you."

"Have you heard about the new restaurant on Mars? The atmosphere was ok, but the place looked a bit rusty."

"Why don't the Greeks, Slavs, and Armenians celebrate Thanksgiving? Because they don't like Turkey"

"Five Construction Workers Walk Into a Bar They should have been looking where they were going"

"Any one want to get a Helen Keller thread going? What do you do after you rape Helen Keller? Break her fingers so she can't tell her mom."

"Why did they make the toilet paper so hard in North Korea? Because the Party wants to make every asshole Red."

"Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus. Gays are definitely from Saturn. You know the only planet chic enough to accessorize with a belt."

"Even crazier than posting photos of your food, is what you actually look like hovering over your meal snapping pictures."