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Joke of the Day

"I was in the pharmacy today... A man approached me offering either a blue pill or a red pill. I didn't know staying in false reality gave you a 24 hour erection."

Next Joke
 
"When grammar nazis correct me, I start to make errors on purpose to mess with them. You can say I'm passive, aggressive."
"Him: I'm tolerant of the gay lifestyle. A neighbor of mine was gay. Me: Thanks. I'm tolerant of yours too. A neighbor of mine was an idiot."
"What is the best cure for a headache? DECAPITATION!!!"
"Dick van Dyke's surgery Welcome to Dick van Dyke's surgery! I'm afraid it's bad news. You've got supercalifragilisticextreme-halitosis."
"Donald Trump seeks total and complete ban on algebra because he thinks that it may be related to alqaeda"
"Only one man has ever entered parliament with honest intentions... ... Guy Fawkes"
"I thought reverse psychology was when.. you made your therapist cry"
"What did the hipster astronaut say when his space mission arrived at the Sun? Not cool."
"Why did the walrus go to the container store? To find a tight seal. "