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Joke of the Day

"What do a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common? They can both smell it but they can't eat it."

"Why did the Jews hate Jesus? Because he gave away salvation for free."

"""I set all the cattle free."" - Reverse Cowgirl"

"Asked my friend who works at the tampon store if he could get me a discount He said he'd pull some strings."

"Annoyed condom Why was the condom annoyed? It got pissed off"

"I'd make a political joke but it would just end up being elected president Ba Dum Tss"

"TIL it's impossible to stick your tongue out and look up at the same time Without looking like a twat"

"Just bought a pair of velcro shoes. What a rip off."

"A man in the restroom today almost pissed on my pants from the next urinal over. I yelled at him and he said ""It's alright man. Wouldn't you rather be pissed off than pissed on?"""

"[1st Date] (Okay, don't let her know you're addicted to eating fruit) Me: This is good [2nd Date] [3rd Date] [4th Date] [5th Date] Her: Stop"