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Joke of the Day

"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten"

"Me: Wow this recumbent bike is pretty comfortable. Trainer: Ok now start pedaling. Me: What?"

"The titanic is all like... ""I nominate all my passengers for the ice bucket challenge"""

"What is the difference between Kanye West and God? God doesn't think that He's Kanye."

"A book just fell on my head. I've only got my shelf to blame."

"Pun contest One day a man saw that there was a local paper puns contest. So he decided to write his 10 best puns and enter them into the contest in hope of winning. Unfortunately no pun in 10 did."

"Why are Fathers like parking spaces? The good ones are already taken!"

"This comes from a good place in my heart, homeless people build the best forts I've ever fucking seen."

"I'm so bad with directions that every time I try to go to Pound Town I end up in the Friend Zone."

"Just finished reading a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at the start but by the end I liked it."