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Joke of the Day

"[During sex] Me: I know you want me to be ""naughty"", but I can barely breathe in this Hamburglar costume."

"What do you call a blind deer? No-eye-deer. What do you call a blind dead deer? Still no-eye-deer. What do you call two blind deer that died while having sex? Still no-fucking-eye-deer."

"What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear? White Vans. I'll be here all week."

"What do Ryan Giggs and Imogen Thomas have in common? I'm not allowed to tell you"

"What idiot decided to call them koalas instead of awww-stralians?"

"Guy goes to his psychotherapist wearing nothing but some transparent underpants the doctor says, ""I can clearly see your nuts"""

"""Weight Watchers"" because ""Obesity Observers"" was too cerebral."

"I like it when people complement me on my grammar"

"Guys, if a girl invites you upstairs for ""coffee,"" first make sure she has coffee, you don't want to get up there and there's no coffee."

"Why does it take longer to make a snow woman than a Snowman? Because you have to hollow out the head."